Reconnect, Rebuild, Restore: Online Couples Therapy That Works

I'm a registered clinical counsellor and psychotherapist who has worked with couples since 2003. I've dedicated my practice to helping couples form healthy and loving relationships. You can read more about my story here.

Online relationship counselling works a little differently from meeting face-to-face.

Here's what you need to do to set up an online relationship counselling session:

1. Request an online counselling appointment at a time that suits you.
2. I will call you to briefly discuss your situation and provide some further details about the first online therapy session.
3. After speaking, I will confirm your booking via my online appointment scheduler, and you’ll receive an email with the online meeting link.
4. My receptionist will then send you the paperwork to be completed before our first meeting and a couple of things to do before the first session.
5. At the conclusion of our first counselling session, we will discuss your future needs in terms of online counselling sessions.

The nature of online work means that there is some information not available to me that I would normally experience in my counselling room.

This doesn't mean that online relationship coaching is any less effective; it just means that we are working under different circumstances.

My experience in working with clients online is that we can still create a dynamic synergy that comes from our interaction and helps you move through your relationship blocks.

I may also encourage you to have a pen and paper, so you can grab notes about anything important that comes up as we discuss your issue. And sometimes I will give you homework and exercises to work on between our sessions.

The videoconferencing technology I use has encryption technology, which is the highest form of Internet security commonly available today. Essentially, if someone were able to intercept a message, they would not be able to decipher it because it is sent in a complex code.

As long as you have a computer and a reliable internet connection, you will be able to participate in online counselling. You need only have a very basic knowledge of computing to be able to engage in the online sessions.

If your partner is unwilling to attend couples therapy, it can be challenging, but there are some constructive steps you can take to address relationship issues. Firstly, try open and honest communication with your partner about your feelings and the importance of seeking support together.

Share your desire for a healthier relationship and express the potential benefits of therapy.

If they remain resistant, consider starting with individual therapy to gain insights into your own patterns and challenges. Focus on self-improvement and personal growth, which can positively impact the dynamics of the relationship.

I also have some strategies that have been very effective in encouraging reluctant partners to attend a session and I will share these when we speak on the phone before the first session.

To ensure we are a good fit, and I can work with your issues, I offer a free 15-minute phone or Zoom inquiry call so you can speak with me about your relationship issues, and I can let you know how I work.

If you'd like to set up your inquiry call, you can do that through my online appointment scheduler.

Online counselling and marriage counselling is not suitable for all couples. If you are in crisis, please contact the 24-hour crisis counselling service LifeLine on 131 114 or 1800-RESPECT.

I do not provide crisis counselling services and will refer you to LifeLine or another suitable organisation if I believe I am not appropriate for you.

If you are experiencing any of the following, it is unlikely that online counselling is appropriate for you:

• current domestic violence: emotional, physical, financial, or sexual
• serious mood swings from big highs to terrible lows that leave you feeling unstable and emotionally fragile
• any impulse to harm yourself or anybody else
• you have a dependence on drugs and/or alcohol
• any other serious psychiatric illness or mood disorder that is not being well managed by a skilled health professional such as a psychiatrist

Any of these factors may indicate you have a serious mental health issue that needs to be attended to by a number of professionals. I encourage you to seek help from your GP if you are experiencing any of those symptoms.

Very occasionally, our session may be disrupted by a technical problem or internet outage. If this happens, and we are unable to restore our connection, I may continue the session on an alternative platform or the phone. If this is not viable, we will reschedule the appointment at no cost to you.